Reflections: The Proverbs guide to social media

Does anyone miss the early days of social media, when it was all about keeping in touch with friends or photos of what you had for dinner? Me too. 

To get higher-priority things done and keep stress lower, I’ve set limits on screen time, but I do keep in touch with family and friends and follow pages of local interest or topics that interest me. Unfortunately, though, social media seems to have evolved into not only an invasion of privacy for marketing purposes, but also a space for everyone to vent every opinion they ever have. 

Being online eliminates the filters of civil in-person society, and rude comments are often unleashed on anyone who chooses to differ from a posted opinion. In one recent example, I asked a legitimate question on an area page about windmills being installed in nearby Carroll County, Arkansas. Although other people had comments or questions on both sides of the issue, I was taken to task by someone who labeled me an anti-progress, poorly-researched idiot whose opinion didn’t matter because I probably voted for Trump; I’m not sure how he thought he knew those things. 

Interestingly, my weekly Proverbs reading right before and after that incident was spot on. While the Proverbs are full of wisdom about what to say or not say, here are just a couple: 

“When words are many, sin is unavoidable, but he who restrains his lips is wise.” (10:19, NLT) 

“To start a quarrel is to release a flood, so abandon the dispute before it breaks out. . . A person of knowledge restrains his words, and a person of understanding maintains a calm spirit. Even a fool is considered wise if he keeps silent. . . ” (17:14, 27-28) 

The methods have changed since Bible times, but human nature has not. In addition to Proverbs, the New Testament also cautions us. Paul advised Timothy to teach behaviors based on inspired Scripture, because it “corrects us when we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right” (2 Tim. 3:16, NLT). 

Timothy served the church in Ephesus, a major trade center with a heavy presence of immorality and idolatry. Paul wrote to the Ephesians, “Let no unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only that which is helpful for building up the one in need and bringing grace to those who listen” (4:29, NLT).

He went on to say that foolish talk and coarseness are out of character for followers of Christ and should be replaced with thanksgiving. 

Some of Paul’s strongest advice was written to another young pastor, Titus, ministering on the island of Crete which was known for lying, gluttony and all-around evil culture. Paul urged Titus to teach new believers to “avoid foolish controversies, genealogies, arguments and quarrels . . . because these things are pointless and worthless. Reject a divisive person after a first and second admonition, knowing that such a person is corrupt and sinful; he is self-condemned” (3:9, 10). 

Divisive? Pointless? Arguments? If that doesn’t describe some social media conversations, I don’t know what does. In that context, Lysa Terkeurst of Proverbs 31 Ministries recently reminded First5 readers, “Self-control is a fruit of the Spirit.” 

When I can insert a Spirit-led thought that makes a valid point or might encourage someone, I want to do so, but I also want to keep firm boundaries about what I will and will not engage in.